Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, magic and power in it. Begin it now. ~ Goethe

Well … here we are, at the start of the new financial year. Have you noticed how fast the months and years are going by or is it just me?

The answer to life?

Throughout the year, I have been pondering life, love and the universe trying to figure the answer to that eternal question ‘what is life all about?’ That is, what is it I am here to do, what is my purpose? Am I happy? What do I want to achieve in life? How do I want to live my life? I am sure most of us, at some stage have had similar thoughts… as I *get* that some of us have never had these types of thoughts. Which begs the question ‘does life just happen to us, or do we play some role in determining the life we lead?’

Choice or no choice?

I am going to work on the proposition that we create the life we lead, we create every drama and every scenario that plays out for us; and this is relevant to both our personal and professional lives. How do we do this? Through choice. Every choice we make is a choice, even when we truly believe we don’t have a choice. The mere notion of not having a choice, IS actually a choice and this sets the scene for whatever is going to happen next. Having said that, no choice is a bad choice. All choices simply provide the path we tread at that given time. If after, we decide we should have, could have done something different or better then that sets the path for making a different choice next time. Where perhaps we fail, is when we keep doing the same thing, keep making the same choices hoping for a different outcome?

The essence of Self?

Life, relationships and leadership all start within. We don’t really understand life, can’t really build sound relationships and certainly aren’t able to lead effectively if we don’t have a sense of who we are. That is, what is the essence of me: who am I, what values do I hold, what is important to me, what would I never compromise, what expectations do I have for me, for others – whether that be family, friends or work colleagues? In other words, what do I know about me?

Now, this is the interesting part. How do I know what I believe to know about me is true? What if, I don’t really know that about me, I just think it to be me? And this is the place most of us are at? We have a view of ourselves we believe to be true but most times it is so inextricably entwined with our EGO that we create a false sense of who we are, and this drives the choices we make. We make choices that are designed to protect our EGO, to protect our sense of self. We make choices that potentially limit our ability, limit ourselves.

Lifelong Learning?

I get it! And I get that this is where learning for life fits. It is about creating consciousness and deep understanding of self. For it is only when we truly understand ourselves that we can effectively interact with others in whatever capacity that may be: as child, as parent, as partner, as work colleague, as team member, as leader. Learning about Self is crucial and understanding that Self is complex and made up of many aspects, all which need to be balanced and nourished is vital. Learning this, learning about self, should underpin every other piece of learning that ever takes place.

Well-being and Wellness?

My business, Lifelong Learning operates within a well-being model called the Seven-Dimensions. The Seven-dimensions enables us to explore work-life balance and the mind-body connection, to build depth of understanding around the fact that the work and learning we undertake, contributes to the health and wellness of each of us as individuals, groups, organisations and communities.

So, what is the answer to life?

Whatever you want it to be. It is all about you. It is knowing that life is full of possibilities and you are full of potential.

Huh? You don’t believe me? Well, therein lies the answer…

So ponder this… what choices are you making now to create the future you want?

Einstein made the comment:

It is the first sign of insanity to keep doing the same thing hoping for a different outcome.

I have just been involved in a two-day workshop geared for world-class presenters and was reminded of the amount of background technique, method, content and context required to truly set participants on fire and ensure learning and behavioural change occurs. Why am I telling you this? Because I don’t believe the average person realises just how much work goes into making a workshop a memorable learning experience and I certainly don’t believe that the majority of the holders of the Certificate IV workplace training qualification get this either?

It seems that in order to provide workplace training of any sorts today, it is obligatory if not mandatory to hold the Certificate IV in Training and Assessment (TAA). So this qualification has become a ‘must have’ in industry and in parallel with this need, the intent of the qualification has become diluted. My colleagues and I talk about this all the time. If we all had a dollar for the amount of times we have heard participants or potential trainers say ‘I just want the piece of paper’ we would all be extremely wealthy. And unfortunately this is exactly what has happened. In the quest to provide the piece of paper, industry is churning out very ordinary trainers, trainers who have no concept of engaging the learner, trainers who have no idea how to structure a piece so that it is clear to the learner what they are learning, trainers who use death by PowerPoint and over load the learner with useless and too much information.

Learning can be overt and learning can be subtle. Sometimes the best learning occurs not by what is being said but by what is not being said. How many trainers know what NOT to say? How many trainers are comfortable with silence? How many trainers provide their learners with an environment that is conducive for them to learn? How many trainers even know how their learners learn?

The Certificate IV in Training and Assessment, the Australian Qualifications Framework and the Australian Quality Training Framework have all been designed to meet a need; a workplace / industry need and workplaces and industries have embraced this framework with gusto – but is it working?

I hang out a lot in the mining sector. This is one industry that has seemingly embraced the framework and sends all their operator trainers on TAA programs. The training departments within most of these mining organisations talk about the AQTF, build their job descriptions, training plans and training matrices around the metalliferous mining competencies and create assessments designed to determine if operators and others within the business are competent to do their jobs: sounds magnificent, feels robust and looks rigorous, but is it?

Mining companies have an added reason to embrace this framework and that is safety. It is legislated within the Mines Safety Inspections Act (MSIA) Regulation 4.13 that all persons working on a mine site will have adequate instruction and training in safety procedures, systems of work and in the tasks required of the employee; they will be assessed before commencing work at the mine; they will be retrained and reassessed whenever systems of work or plant and equipment change; records are made of any instruction, training, retraining, assessment or reassessment and those records will be kept for a minimum of 2 years after the record is made.

So Section 4.13 provides a compelling reason for mining companies to embrace this training and assessment framework and build and support a world class training system. Sadly, this does not happen. Let’s unpack that last sentence; sadly – this – does – not – happen. I am sure by now many reading this blog are feeling quite indignant that I should make such a comment. But that is the point. I so understand that for all intents and purposes it appears that many, if not all companies within industries have what they would feel is a robust training and assessment system. However, this becomes extremely diluted because the same companies focus on the parts that are not truly important. They focus on the paperwork, on the record keeping, on meeting policy and legislative frameworks and audits; they focus on the parts of training that do not affect cultural or behavioural change forgetting that the only reason we train people is to influence the way they do the job aligned to best or world practice.

So given that I have done my hours, given that I have been operating in this field for many years, I feel my opinion is worthy of listening along with industry statistics (workers compensation and the number of injuries and deaths) that suggest whatever the mining industry is doing currently, is not working. So my question is, given we all know it is not working, why then are organisation’s not doing anything different?

It reminds me of that quote:

If we continue to do what we have always done, we will continue to get what we have always got.

So we churn out trainers that have a piece of paper, yet do not have basic understanding of pedagogy. We have trainers that have a piece of paper, yet cannot tell you about the Australian Qualifications Framework (AQF), because if they could, then they would know that there is really no need for them to have the TAA if they are not issuing a qualification and many, if not most mining organisation’s do not. We have trainers that have a piece of paper that suggest they can assess the competence of others, yet they cannot tell you what the principles of assessment are or the rules of evidence?

If the trainers that hold the qualification understood just these three (3) key principles then I would agree… it would be likely that the organisation would have a robust training and assessment system. But when the fundamentals are missing is it any wonder we have a less than second rate training system that supports the suggestion ‘you got your qualification out of a weetie packet.’

So here is the thing: for learning to occur, for the adult learner to be engaged and fired up about learning, for cultural and behavioural change to occur and people remain safe, we need to go Beyond Cert IV and ensure our trainers get that training is not just an event that our punters show up to and sign appropriate bits of paper, it is about an outcome. It is about visibly seeing a shift in participants after the event and that shift, adds value back to the individual and the business.

Do you have memories of certain events that perhaps decades later you still recall as potentially being defining moments in your life?

I do, I have several. One of these was when I was thirteen and at the home of my very first love interest, a boy from the neighbourhood. His mother knew of my mother, so she was making friendly conversation with me and asking after her. I recall it being just at the time my mother was first needing to wear glasses.

I was recounting the events of how my mother had just been to see the optimist (sic) and was due to go back a week later to pick up her glasses. I was animated in my storytelling as I felt so grown up to be having this conversation with this boy’s mother. So I mentioned the optimist many times and was puzzled when my boy interest kept giggling and having these knowing glance exchanges with his mother who I recall at one time putting her finger over her lips in that ssshhhhh motion.

I left and went home both elated and puzzled at what might have been happening during this conversation.

The next day, I was in the car with my mum and dad and I mentioned how I had caught up with Mrs Taylor and was explaining how I had been telling her how mum had been to the optimist, when my dad interjected with ‘you mean optometrist?’ And there, in those few seconds, my stomach knotted and my life slipped into deep embarrassment. How could I have been soooooo stupid to not know it was an optometrist and not an optimist?

I then recalled the look of knowing that was being shared between my love interest boy and his mother and wondered why did they not correct me? Why did they smirk and giggle and basically allow me to make an idiot of myself and say nothing?

And here I am thirty odd years later, writing about this event because it is so indelibly etched in my memory as one of those life defining moments.

Now when I see people with their fly un-done, or green gunk stuck in their teeth or suffering bad body odour, I tell them playfully, when appropriate and always respectfully. And you know what? All people are thankful and grateful as I know I would have been had I been picked up for my incorrect word all those years ago and saved the pain of re-living the embarrassment over and over again in my head.

So the moral to this story is courage and compassion. Find the courage to tell the person that is potentially embarrassing themselves so they can rectify the situation and move on, rather than them having to work it out later and re-live the hell for however long it takes to get over it, if indeed it is ever gotten over?

I can’t seem to shake this feeling of restlessness, of wondering what I want to be when I grow up. Life is funny don’t you think? Just when you think you should have your stuff together, you realize you don’t and go chasing rainbows. Well at least I do!

I have recently returned from a wonderful six (6) days in the northern parts of Australia. I was in Darwin for nearly three (3) days and then sat on Cable Beach in Broome for the next three (3) days naval gazing, sipping the odd cocktail and watching the magnificent sunsets – sigh, what a life!

I made the decision easily to run away but then couldn’t decide where to go. I thought about China as I do have a longing to go there (that is a whole other story) but that didn’t feel right and then the thought came to me, Darwin. Yes, Darwin! One of my clients mentioned a project that the company is involved with in Darwin and suggested they (the project team) might need me in some capacity. So when I thought about running away I thought well perhaps a visit to Darwin to meet the folk on the project would be good as it might turn into a piece of work, something worthwhile. And then to make it feel like I was really running away I booked a couple of nights at Cable Beach Club Resort.

I have blogged about Eckhart Tolle (Power of Now) before but you know it is so true; you can’t force the pace of life, which is why it is so important to appreciate the here and now.

My here and now is really weird, even weird for me, but I get I am in the place and pace I need to be right now. The universe is a wonderful teacher if we simply take the time to listen and observe what is going on around us. Most of us however, get so caught up in just living or surviving that we don’t really see or hear much else.

So this is where I am at. I started writing this blog on the verandah of my room, sweat pouring off me as it was really hot – around 38 degrees and very muggy!

When I first arrived at the Resort I have to admit, I thought what am I doing here? I have done this before, taken myself off somewhere secluded only to be reminded that I am an extrovert and get totally bored with myself within 5 minutes! This time however, (I must be growing up) I persisted and to my absolute delight I really enjoyed the quiet time, actually enjoyed my own company. Let me also put this into perspective. Whilst I may have been there on my own physically, I had been texting the whole time (the joy of mobile phones) so really, I had been there with at least half a dozen of my closest friends! You have no idea the comfort that new text message beep on the mobile phone brings to an extrovert on a solo trip!

So anyway Darwin was fantastic, the project team a great bunch of people and I had the added bonus of meeting a very nice travelling executive that likes to party and explore neural linguistic programming (NLP) as a sales tool, which of course for me being into Lifelong Learning made chatting with him very interesting. Again, that is a whole other story (so many stories to share) but meanwhile click here to learn more about NLP.

Back to Broome, the Resort has a Day Spa so I availed myself of daily moments of bliss with relaxation massages and am pleased to report that I have gained some clarity around my current situation.

So, clarity: I am where I need to be right now. The pace my life is unfolding is as it should be and I should not try to force this. I am re-thinking what I want to be when I grow up so I am in planning mode which, yes the irony of that last statement is not lost on me… trying to plan for something you cannot force the pace of! And the people in my life right now are the RIGHT people to be in my life and I am enjoying every experience that is being presented to me.

This all feels a bit Zen, but listening to life and allowing the universe to be the teacher is a good place to be, especially for me, as I am learning to let go and *get* that I actually don’t have to be in control!

Hmmmm so there is a force greater than me out there? Uh huh, there is. And that clarity… that ah-hah moment, has been huge. I love learning!

You see, lunch with the girls serves many purposes but none more important than having a forum to discuss relationships. We were a mix of women at the lunch and whilst there were many topics we could and did discuss the main topic was men and relationships. Out of the seven of us, only one is married, two have never married and are not in a relationship, I have left the relationship and the rest are in various states of new relationships.

We are all successful business women, yet the predominant topic at lunch was men! Are we, as women then, not really happy unless we are in a relationship? And if we are not in a relationship and we say we are happy, are we really? For me, this is a bit confronting given I am embarking on a solo journey, what if I will never be happy? Are there degrees of happiness?

The Dalai Lama says “we are simply on this earth to be happy” so maybe we need to ponder the following questions: (1) what is happiness; and (2) when am I most happy?

It is useful to listen to the language we use when talking about happiness to determine ‘when am I most happy.’ Is our language (therefore our happiness) based in the past - “I was so happy when we had the house down south and I didn’t have to worry about xyz” or future oriented – “I will be really happy when the kids are finished at school and I can take that holiday I have been yearning for years.”

True happiness or authentic happiness is appreciating the here and now, finding happiness in every day simple things such as I am happy to be alive, I am happy to have a roof over my head, I am happy I can make fantastic pancakes and enjoy good coffee in the mornings. Happiness is not authentic if it is conditional. That is, happiness can not be based on something else needing to happen such as “I will be happy when I lose those extra 10 kilos, I can only be happy if you do this, or give me that.” Being happy is a choice. For me, I am happy to simply give life a go – Que Sera Sera!

This is why you have lunch with the girls, to ponder these types of questions. The lunch part of lunch with the girls is really inconsequential. Lunch with the girls is not about the food (although it has to be good) it is the collective support and nurturing we offer to each other. Lunch with the girls is the best therapy session any of us can partake in. And lunch with the girls also expands our social networks as we each invite someone from our pack to join us for lunch in another pack therefore connecting with other women and broadening perspective.

Is it any wonder women are much better than men when it comes to emoting and talking about life, love and the universe? We have been practising over lunch for years!

Lunch with the girls? Absolutely! Now that thought makes me happy…

Favourite lunch spots: Tell me about your fav spots, these are mine…

The Subiaco Hotel, The Ess Bar – Subiaco, The Raffles Hotel (Tapas Bar and Deco) – Applecross, Cocos – South Perth, The Botanica – Innaloo, The Blue Duck – Cottesloe, Indiana Tea Rooms – Cottesloe and the Opus Restaurant in the Richardson Hotel – West Perth (also does a great degustation).